The End

Over the past several weeks, events have occurred that have left me both emotionally drained and oddly energized at the same time. I have been very content and at peace with the changes but inevitabley find myself tearing up and having that awful lump in my throat when I think back. Still, it is time to move forward.

Therefore I have started a new blog. If you are interested in continuing to read my amateur reflections on life, you can find me at: http://hayleyfindsamap.blogspot.com/

To Do Lists ..

Lately, I've been in the mood to make lists of things to do. I feel such a sense of accomplishment when I check something off. Even something as simple as "buy apples".

Check.

Done.

If I were a psych major, I might think this was a control issue. It's really a short-term need to put things in order and get my life together. Some of the tasks have been difficult. For instance, I've been trying to be very disciplined about running everyday. It's so easy to make excuses in this cold weather. Some are emotionally painful. For details on that, see previous 12 months of posts.

Today's task is bittersweet: Start New Blog. Posting here feels strange and I'm in the mood to write. I may come back and post a link. Those of you who care, can follow me there. If not, take care.

The Maze..

through the thorny archway
down the foggy tunnel
into the verdant maze.
pulled forward as if
by string.

tempted to look back.

at one end
the monster,
the beast,
the wreck,
who sailed away
into himself.
at the other,
shadowless sunlight,
exuding warmth
patiently waiting.

never looking back.

the string finally broken.


Thanks for the words Eric.

On making up ..

This was a terrible mistake.

I should have followed my instincts.
And left things exactly where they were.
I am more conflicted than ever.
My peace has been disturbed.

This was a terrible mistake.

Time Tenses

I am your past.
It seemed perfect.

The future unknown.
The present non-existent.

I am your past.
Hindsight makes it perfect.

More

"What are you writing?"

"What you just said."

"Why?"

"I want it all some place so that I won't ever forget."

"You don't need to write it down. I will remind you."

...

I do not know, nor understand
What you have become.